My Usual Seasonal Lament




This morning on my way to work I was SOBBING as I listened to my audio book. I must admit, ahem, that I'm a little more tender hearted than usual this week. But. Goodness! I had to redo my makeup at the stoplights like those women who put on their faces on the way to work every day. How do they DO that?

I'm listening to The Hunger Games, by Suzanne Collins. It's the first book in a series of three. I've been warned that book two contains even more crying. I don't usually pick books for their ability to wring out my emotions – I'm more into the escape thing – and I might not have started reading this one had I known. But it's really really good. I'm not done yet, so if you've read it I don't want to hear any details – la la la la I can't hear you!

It's not just been this book that has opened my floodgates. I couldn't even think about the Chilean miners without crying. And this story about the teenager with Down Syndrome who got a touchdown in his high school football game (I read about it on JennyMac's blog). I'm just a regular fountain these days. My boss thinks my allergies are really bad.

I'm not a person who typically cries a lot. But I will let go when I read something touching or watch a tender vittles moment in a movie (or a Hallmark commercial). I've often thought it was my way of letting it all out in a safe way – where I don't have to examine my feelings too closely.


So what's going on inside my heart these days? Lots of stuff I of course don't want to confront – but the biggest thing & the one that makes it harder to take the other stuff is that despite its beauty, fall makes me very sad. Winter's a comin'. Sigh.

Comments

  1. I hope your heartache is easily cured.

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  2. Oh my! Hugs to you, my dear, and thanks for the good book tip. Dang! I just don't know tho...

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  3. Today it feels more like winter than autumn here! And it's not even November...
    Funny though because our daughter is a huge fan of winter and so her enthusiasm for it bucks me up. 'How can you complain about it,' she said this morning, 'what other season can you make snowmen in?'
    x

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  4. Boy, I can't remember the last time a book made me cry. It's great to connect to something you are reading so intensely. Then again, if you are like me... there are those days when nothing and yet everything is wrong and I feel on the verge all day long.

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  5. My son and his girlfriend read this book and talked about it the other day. It sounds incredible.

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  6. I love fall with that kind of love that has an edge of pain in it, knowing it is temporary and you'll have to feast on the memories. The kind you have with a summer romance that is in the first week of August...you just know that IF you see him again next year, things will be not be the same, even if you hope they will be.

    And I love how God makes it so achingly beautiful with His paintbrush that the memories are glorious indeed. Your photos are a GREAT reminder of that.

    Now I gotta read that book. I'm a blubbering mess with sad/happy stories as well!

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  7. Passing seasons can do this to me too. I must say that I love that last picture of the red leaf. Its a great image of your words.

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  8. I think I will put that book on my list. I think our bodies were meant to let it all out and cry at least a few times a year. I usually feel better after a good cry...even though I get embarrassed if anyone see me.

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  9. I miss summer too.

    I think those tears are a good thing. They say tears bathe the soul. Hope that helps!

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  10. that story of the football player, oh my god. too much!

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  11. Awsome two pictures of fallen leaves!
    The truth is that in autumn we get moody and easily cry, regardless of dramas going on in books or in daily life.

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  12. sometimes you just have to get your emotions out - its good to do it.

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  13. Oh but sometimes a good cry is so cleansing! I'm sorry for your tears but perhaps, it is just the thing..it is a way to release extra energy and bottled up emotion. And certainly a book will do that to the toughest people, including myself.

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