Last night I was weighted down with sadness. Thank goodness the end of the Ken Burns National Parks documentary was on – I could cry without self-consciousness. I didn’t want to worry Dr. M.
I was sad because I found out that a new Facebook friend, an acquaintance from high school, was struggling with breast cancer. She’s had the disease for 10 years. She says it’s like the whack-a-mole game & just pops up in new places unexpectedly. She’s underinsured because of her 10 year battle, and can’t afford a biopsy of the latest findings.
I was sad because I miss my mother & I can hardly bear to think about her last days.
I was sad because Dr. M’s family is struggling with his mother’s condition - and we’re struggling too.
I was sad because it feels like the people I pray for don’t ever get better.
I was sad because we found out the some of the children who play next door used to live in our house - & someone in the neighborhood complained to the police & they were “run off.” I don’t know what the adults did (or didn’t do) that caused the problem. But I’m sad because the boys lost their home.
And lastly, I was sad because Cluckles the Chicken has gone missing.
Today, with the bright sunshine after pouring rain and storms, I want to say that I feel better. That I think that it’s just my usual fall melancholy. That the tightness in my chest has eased.
I want to.