Monday, February 1, 2010

Tom Cruise & The Virgin Mary

I wanted to call off from work today in the worst way. I felt achy and gritty eyed and I wanted to stay home to do laundry & read my new J.D. Robb book (Kindred in Death). I lay there & thought about it for a minute, but then I just went ahead & got up. Later I was trying to decide whether I felt too introverted to call my boss, or if it was mostly my sense of responsibility that got me out of bed. I think it was some of both.

Erin at Fierce Beagle introduced me to the website TypeLogic, which analyzes the different types from the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator. When we were in seminary Dr. M & I took the MBTI. I'm an ISTP Introverted Sensing Thinking Perceiving), and Dr. M is an INFP (Introverted iNtuitive Feeling Perceiving). I think it's a pretty accurate gauge of a person's inclinations. And it has helped us innumerable times in our marriage. Because, according to the MBTI, we are enigma to one another: a puzzle; totally foreign in nearly every facet.

I want to fix. the. problem. Dr. M wants to understand how we feel about the problem. I'm a present moment person (so present moment in fact that I have to make a concerted effort to dress for the weather outside, not just how I feel at the moment I'm putting the clothes on – which is usually hot from my shower). Dr. M is present in all times. There is no past, present or future with him. All times are now. I want to peruse my options, make a choice quickly & get the heck out of the store. Dr. M wants to make sure he sees every possible option, pick one, but then think about it a while longer, and then think some more after we've left the store, and maybe next week too.

I think we work because we're both introverted and neither of is all that into extreme order. But if you go check out our type descriptions from the website (links below), you'll see that the author lists some famous people with our types. And I'm just not sure how Tom Cruise (me) would get along with the Virgin Mary (Dr. M). Dr. M is James Taylor, Carl Rogers & Anne of Green Gables. I'm Charles Bronson, Clint Eastwood & Frank Zappa.

I don't really know how we work. But we definitely do.

If you'd like to read about our types (or figure out your own), you can go here for mine (ISTP) and here for Dr. M's (INFP).


  1. You could drive yourself absolutely insane, Bug (just my opinion) with self-analyzation of all this 'stuff'. I mean, "Why do it?" If it's working, why would you want to try to analyze and/or mess with it? Seriously!

  2. Oh Dana, I laughed so hard at this post. You and Dr. M mirror me and Ivan. TOO FUNNY. I had to read it out loud to him and we both had a good laugh.

    Our friends always think it's a hoot that I'm more of a "hunter" when it comes to shopping than Ivan. His DMD (decision making disorder) has long been a family joke :-) And it's frequently followed by PDD (post decision dissonance). When I have to go shopping with him, I take a book. (But mostly I just try to get out of having to go shopping with him. lol)

  3. But are you both oldest or youngest in the sibling order...that fascinates me because it is all about nurture vs. nature. I love a good nurture vs. nature discussion!!

    I might just have to take that test.


  4. I think I will head over there to check it out. I love analyzing people, places and things....well maybe I don't love it, but that is what I am and what I do. I think I have taken those tests before, but can't think of what my results were, so I will take them again and let you know. My husband and I are very different in many ways. But you know...I think most couples are. Dr. M sounds really calm. Heading over to check out the site..

  5. Thanks for clarifying when you were in Zambia! I'll have to go back and look at all your "Sundays in Zambia" when I have more time.

    I'm always interested when someone is my "type"--INFP.

  6. Heehee...well, you know what they say about opposites.

  7. Scientology kills. I think I would choose God over being sacrificed to people who think they are God.

  8. The first time we went to counseling, we took those tests with similar results only reversed. You'd think after 33 years or so we'd have it all worked out but sometimes it's still a struggle.

  9. Amy - we both have one brother. I'm the oldest by 21 months. Dr. M is the youngest by 4 years. However, when Dr. M was 4 his brother had a serious medical condition (rheumatic fever) which sort of messed up their birth order stuff.

  10. I'd say it's the matching shirts that make you work. Don't ever change.

    -lacochran (INTJ)

  11. When I read your description of yourself, I thought, how male! Very funny, so efficient and getting-things-done! A typical first-born, too. I`m glad you have found each other and get along so well!

  12. This is so ironic, Bug.
    My husband and I did the Myers-Briggs test years ago, but he decided yesterday that he was going to do it again. He's still an ISTP. Same as before. He wants me to take it again, but I'm sure I'm the same old ENFJ that I've always been - completely opposite of him, but like you and Dr. M, it works. Maybe I'll do a post on it, too.

  13. What if you're bipolar?

    Can you be an outgoing introvert, depending on whether you're 'up' or 'down'.

    I guess I'm introverted most of the time but it depends entirely on whom I'm with, where I am, and, probably, whether I've had a couple of drinks.

    It really does not bother me too much at my time of life Bug. I guess it's a case of WYSIWYG with moi.

  14. Oh it's fun! Don and I did this test early in our marriage, and I can't tell you how much it helped us understand each other - well at least accept each other. Don is an ISTP like you, and I am an ENFJ - completely opposite in all 4 areas! That alone helped us relax a little about how differently we saw things. DUH.

    You and the shower and clothes, wow, you are SO DON, ha!

  15. I enjoy reading about the differences in personality. I am an ESFJ and hubby is an ISTJ, and we do seem to compliment one another to a large degree.

  16. I wanted to call in sick today, too. I just can't bring myself to do it.

  17. INTP.

    I attended a (fairly lame) three day "project management college" when I was working at a shipyard. (we go there so we can spend one week NOT hating each other while we prepare for two years of hating eachother's guts).

    We did the MBTI then.

  18. Dear the Bug,
    ENFP. Supposedly that makes me a crusader of the most sensitive kind, so long as I get to talk about myself.

    I am afraid of people who are described as above, therefore, it better mean something else!

    Me me me, and how i feel,
    Ann T.


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