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| Photograph of Florence Thompson with three of her children by Dorthea Lange, 1936. Reproduced from The Commons on Flickr with use restricted to personal, educational or research purposes. |
I move through the rooms of my life
As if in a dream, exhausted by
All those undone and undoable things
As if in a nightmare, moving through
Molasses air and endless hallways
As if my life were an inescapable burden
Placed upon my bent and broken back
My rucksack is full of food and clean water
And currency for the desires of my heart
In that rucksack is a college degree
And an embarrassment of shoes
I have five pairs of black trousers
The back of my petulance is broken with blessings.
This poem is for the Poetry Jam and for my ABC’s of Gratitude series. Almost done!
Oh, bravo Bug! Love 'Molasses air' and the whole movement of the poem to the final line. The very good final line.
ReplyDeleteYes, that last line pulls it all together wonderfully!
ReplyDeleteI've always loved that photo.
ReplyDeleteHi & Greetings ! Chanced upon your blog. Very happy to read your post.Such a meaningful & melancholy poem. Very beautiful.The picture of the weary lady is superb!
ReplyDeleteHave a great weekend.
Oh, dear one, this is spectacular. From the mechanical detail of the omitted punctuation (it drives me forward relentlessly), to the poetic details of structure (that use of the repetitive "As if" is compelling), phrasing (that last line!), extended metaphor...those five pairs of black trousers...honey, you got it all goin' on!
ReplyDeleteAn interesting one. Good work.
ReplyDeletex
Thanks guys. Chris - it felt rather relentless as I was writing it!
ReplyDelete"The back of my petulance is broken with blessings"....this is an amazing piece of writing Bug....:-)
ReplyDeleteI understand weary. I wear it like a uniform.
ReplyDeleteMolasses air? Brings to mind the molasses tragedy in Boston. They say on hot days, the residents can still smell molasses.
Molasses air and endless hallways...what a great description...sad that the college degree in that rucksack does little...
ReplyDeletehandsome poetry.
ReplyDeleteexhausted by
ReplyDeleteAll those undone and undoable things
That most of us can relate too. Is anyone really able to "plan" their life? The use of no punctuation really works here.
felt the pain and suffocation in this, as well as the frustration and disappointments of his life.
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