Poetikat is driving the poetry bus this week & has decided that we should all give thought to the recent inferno. Here is mine.
When Jesus is burning
And what seems
Insane to me
Brings you comfort
And peace?
Where is God
When Jesus is burning
And there is menace
In the ocean
Where sanctuary has
Gone away?
Where is God
When Jesus is burning
And I miss my mother's
Impatient gesture and that Look
As she turns away from
The camera?
Where is God
When Jesus is burning
And my heart is
Full to bursting
And three sizes
Too small?
Where is God
When Jesus is burning?
There in the fire and
There in the ashes
There in your eyes
As you watch me
With love
WOW very forceful - very sad with anger in the background. I really like your repeated use of the lines
ReplyDelete"Where is God
When Jesus is burning"
For me there sense if yin and yang in each stanza
Excellent! I really identified with that third verse. Amazing how you encompassed her character in those small details. The ending is very forgiving. Nice work!
ReplyDeleteSuch a powerful poem, the eloquence and perfect placing of each word is most successful in portraying a striking poignancy. A delight to read :)
ReplyDeleteThat was a powerful poem, Dana.
ReplyDeleteI have a really hard time trying to attach it to that image though. I think of that image, and have to try and stomp all over the "Jesus, doing the Chicken Dance in the Endzone!" imagery that is attendant to it.
The poem is very good, but I personally think 'twas God that set fire to the Big Tacky Jesus because..."Ya'll are clearly in need of a sign down there. My eyes! My eyes! Unsee! Unsee!"
Please don't hit me.
There's a Yorkie mix on the Daily Puppy named Martini. I'm blaming my irreverence on him. Yorkie Martini made me do it. Uh huh.
Thanks guys. Alane you are a nut. Truly :)
ReplyDeleteThe repetition lends the power to this poem Dana. Sounds as though you're having a moment of crisis? Well, the poem's author, anyway...
ReplyDeleteDear The Bug,
ReplyDeleteI agree with the poetic comments: the repetition is great, and the mood is clear and the third stanza rocks as characterization.
And I don't think you need a Yorkie named after a cocktail to decide this poem was better than than its initial prompt.
Wonderful,
Ann T.
A lovely poem, and again a nice spark of hope at the end - well done for leading us into this interesting detour!
ReplyDeleteYes, indeedy, the repetition lends power. A lot of people are probably asking this question now.
ReplyDeleteThat's a beautiful poem , Bug.Really works well and stands alone as a piecen of poetry, without the pictures.So good,Well done!
ReplyDeleteOh Bug, that's really good. As all have said, those two repeated first lines are stand-out, and then you make the poem intimate and the question real with what follows in each stanza. And the line of faith and hope at the end.
ReplyDeleteStunning.
I hope I get to comment after Titus, Bug, because Titus just said everything I wanted to say but said it better.
ReplyDeleteYour poem is absolutely heart-touching. Thank you for the redemption in the last stanza.
Very powerful.
ReplyDeletex
Very powerful and thought-provoking Bug - what a variety of poems this image has engendered.
ReplyDeleteIs it just me or is there a Dr Seuss reference in there? A heart three sizes too small - The Grinch, also a story of redemption?
ReplyDeleteliked it very much thanks for sharing
cfm
Mouse - you're exactly right. In fact, I went to look it up to make sure I had the number of sizes too small correct :)
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